More George Carlin Quotes

1. "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the ...
   
2. "I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, ...
   
3. As a matter of principle, I never attend the first ...
   
4. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. ...
   
5. Eventually, alas, I realized the main purpose of b ...
   
6. Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is a ...
   
7. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece ...
   
8. Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, ...
   
9. Hobbies cost money but interests are free. ...
   
10. Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important ...
    
11. I like Florida. Everything is in the 80's. The tem ...
    
12. I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out ...
    
13. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with ...
    
14. I was thinking about how people seem to read the B ...
    
15. I'm completely in favor of the separation of Churc ...
    
16. I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, b ...
    
17. If a man smiles all the time he's probably selling ...
    
18. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? ...
    
19. If someone with multiple personalities threatens t ...
    
20. If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beate ...
    
21. Keep thy religion to thyself. ...
    
22. Life.....is a series of dogs. ...
    
23. No one ever says, "It's only a game" when their te ...
    
24. Some national parks have long waiting lists for ca ...
    
25. The day after tomorrow is the third day of the res ...
    
26. The IQ and the life expectancy of the average Amer ...
    
27. The very existence of flamethrowers proves that so ...
    
28. There are nights when the wolves are silent and on ...
    
29. There's no present. There's only the immediate fut ...
    
30. Think of how stupid the average person is, and rea ...
    
31. Weather forcast for tonight: dark. Continued dark ...
    
32. Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fight ...
    
33. What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on befo ...
    
34. What's all this stuff about motivation? I say, if ...
    
35. When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, ...
    
36. Why is the man (or woman) who invests all your mon ...
    
37. You have to be realistic about terrorism. Certain ...