More George Burns Quotes

1. A good sermon should have a good beginning and a g ...
   
2. Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, ...
   
3. Actually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded ...
   
4. Age to me means nothing. I can't get old; I'm work ...
   
5. At my age flowers scare me. ...
   
6. Be quick to learn and wise to know. ...
   
7. Bridge is a game that separates the men from the b ...
   
8. By the time you're eighty years old you've learned ...
   
9. Do you know what it means to come home at night to ...
   
10. Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in be ...
    
11. Everyday happiness means getting up in the morning ...
    
12. First of all you've got to have talent. And then y ...
    
13. First you forget names, then you forget faces. Nex ...
    
14. For thirty years my act consisted of one joke. And ...
    
15. Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close ...
    
16. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was ...
    
17. I can't understand why I flunked American history. ...
    
18. I don't believe in dying. It's been done. I'm work ...
    
19. I get a standing ovation jaust standing. ...
    
20. I honestly think it is better to be a failure at s ...
    
21. I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most p ...
    
22. I smoke 10 to 15 cigars a day, at my age I have to ...
    
23. I spent a year in that town, one Sunday. ...
    
24. I was married by a judge. I should have asked for ...
    
25. I would go out with women my age, but there are no ...
    
26. I'd rather be a failure at something I enjoy than ...
    
27. I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the l ...
    
28. If it's a good script I'll do it. And if it's a ba ...
    
29. If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. ...
    
30. Look to the future, because that is where you'll s ...
    
31. Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywher ...
    
32. No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsibl ...
    
33. Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of S ...
    
34. Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was ...
    
35. Say "Goodnight" Gracie. ...
    
36. Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school ...
    
37. The secret of a good sermon is to have a good begi ...
    
38. Too bad that all the people who know how to run th ...
    
39. We often think the way Gracie talks, but we pride ...
    
40. When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick. ...
    
41. When I was young I was called a rugged individuali ...
    
42. When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring yo ...
    
43. You can't help getting older, but you don't have t ...