Famous Men Quotes - Famous Quotes about Men
A gentleman is simply a patient wolf.
- Lana Turner
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A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to him. And then you gotta get rid of all that macho crap that they pick up from beer commercials. And then there's my personal favorite, the male ego.
- Roseanne Barr
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A man in the house is worth two in the street.
- Mae West
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All modern men are descended from a worm-like creature, but it shows more on some people.
- Will Cuppy
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Always suspect any job men willingly vacate for women.
- Jill Tweedie
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Any woman can fool a man if she wants to and if he's in love with her.
- Agatha Christie
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Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.
- Helen Rowland
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Behind every successful man there is a surprised woman.
- Maryon Pearson
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Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.
- Oscar Wilde
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Don't let a man put anything over on you except an umbrella.
- Mae West
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Every time a woman leaves off something she looks better, but every time a man leaves off something he looks worse.
- Will Rogers
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Everyone knows that a man can always marry even if he reaches 102, is penniless, and has all his faculties gone. There is always some woman willing to take a chance on him.
- Amy Vanderbilt
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For everybody knows that it requires very little to satisfy the gentlemen, if a woman will only give her mind to it.
- Margaret Oliphant
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Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone.
- Lenny Bruce
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I am not a cat man, but a dog man, and all felines can tell this at a glance -- a sharp, vindictive glance.
- James Thurber
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I never liked the men I loved, and never loved the men I liked.
- Fanny Brice
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I refuse to consign the whole male sex to the nursery. I insist on believing that some men are my equals.
- Brigid Brophy
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I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV.
- Tracy Smith
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I've dated men my age, younger than me and older. The only difference is the young ones are quicker at taking out the garbage.
- Lara Flynn Boyle
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If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?
- Linda Ellerbee
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If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman.
- Margaret Thatcher
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It takes a woman twenty years to make a man of her son, and another woman twenty minutes to make a fool of him.
- Helen Rowland
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Man has will, but woman has her way.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes
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Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything in the house.
- Jean Kerr
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Men are generally more law-abiding than women. Women have the feeling that since they didn't make the rules, the rules have nothing to do with them.
- Diane Johnson
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Men are nicotine-soaked, beer-besmirched, whisky-greased, red-eyed devils.
- Carry Nation
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Men can read maps better than women. Cause only the male mind could conceive of one inch equalling a hundred miles.
- Roseanne Barr
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Men think monogamy is something you make dining tables out of.
- Kathy Lette
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Most women set out to change a man, and when they have changed him they do not like him.
- Marlene Dietrich
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My attitude toward men who mess around is simple: If you find 'em, kill 'em.
- Loretta Lynn
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My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
- Tim Allen
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Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near.
- Helen Rowland
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On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we can open all our own jars.
- Bruce Willis
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Remember all Men would be tyrants if they could.
- Abigail Adams
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Show me a man who lives alone and has a perpetually clean kitchen, and 8 times out of 9 I'll show you a man with detestable spiritual qualities.
- Charles Bukowski
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The desire of the man is for the woman, but the desire of the woman is for the desire of the man.
- Anne Louise Germaine de Staël
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The first time you buy a house you think how pretty it is and sign the check. The second time you look to see if the basement has termites. It's the same with men.
- Lupe Velez
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The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those which he didn't commit when he had the opportunity.
- Helen Rowland
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The more I know about men the more I like dogs.
- Gloria Allred
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The more I see of men, the more I admire dogs.
- Jeanne-Marie Roland
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The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.
- Roseanne Barr
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There are two things that will be believed of any man whatsoever, and one of them is that he has taken to drink.
- Booth Tarkington
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There is a vast difference between the savage and the civilized man, but it is never apparent to their wives until after breakfast.
- Helen Rowland
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There's nineteen men livin' in my neighborhood
eighteen of them are fools and the one ain't no doggone good.
- Bessie Smith
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To a woman the first kiss is just the end of the beginning but to a man it is the beginning of the end.
- Helen Rowland
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To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
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What is man, when you come to think upon him, but a minutely set, ingenious machine for turning, with infinite artfulness, the red wine of Shiraz into urine?
- Karen Blixen
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When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.
- Elayne Boosler
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Whether women are better than men I cannot say—but I can say they are certainly no worse.
- Golda Meir
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Why can't women tell jokes? Because we marry them!
- Kathy Lette
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Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract.
- Kathy Lette
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Why is it men are permitted to be obsessed about their work, but women are only permitted to be obsessed about men?
- Barbra Streisand
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Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes.
- Oscar Wilde
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Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work or prison.
- Tim Allen
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You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're exactly alike.
- Dave Attell
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You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.
- Erica Jong
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