Jerry Seinfeld Quotes - Famous Quotes by Jerry Seinfeld
Born: 1954-04-29
Died: 0000-00-00
Jerry Seinfeld Biography
A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.
- Jerry Seinfield
More quotations on: [ Intellect ] [ Book ] ***
A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.
- Jerry Seinfield
More quotations on: [ Death ] ***
I had a dream last night that a hamburger was eating ME!
- Jerry Seinfeld, Seinfeld episode "The Van Buren Boys" - broadcas
***
I think that people who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.
- Jerry Seinfeld
More quotations on: [ Lying ] ***
I was the best man at the wedding. If I'm the best man, why is she marrying him?
- Jerry Seinfield
More quotations on: [ Wedding ] ***
Introducing 'Lite' - The new way to spell 'Light', but with twenty per cent fewer letters.
- Jerry Seinfield
More quotations on: [ Language ] [ Advertising ] ***
It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day just exactly fits in the newspaper.
- Jerry Seinfield
More quotations on: [ News ] ***
Men want the same thing from women that they want from their underwear... a little support, comfort, and freedom.
- Jerry Seinfeld
***
Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.
- Jerry Seinfeld
***
The whole object of comedy is to be yourself and the closer you get to that, the funnier you will be.
- Jerry Seinfeld
***
There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.
- Jerry Seinfeld
***
Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.
- Jerry Seinfield
More quotations on: [ Beauty ] ***
|
|
